A Theatre Department’s Reaction to the Internal Auditor
Subsequent up on final week’s article, “Why Is the Finance Workplace Generally Hassling Us?” this inside memo explores feasible responses to an interior auditor’s questions with regards to the use of means by a theatre division.*
Inside MEMORANDUM
TO: Rosemary Pilkington, associate vice president for interior audits
CC: J. Pierrepont Finch, vice president for administration and finance Milton Gatch, university comptroller
FROM: Rob Fosse, chair, Loesser Section of Theatre
RE: Theatre Section Audit Responses: Portion 1, fiscal a long time 2017, 2018, 2019
I’m creating to remedy concerns posed to our costume designer, prop master and sound technician concerning particular buys manufactured in fiscal a long time 2017, 2018 and 2019. We enjoy your office’s vital perform to make sure monies are spent appropriately and expenditures adhere to Wicket University’s guidelines, contractual agreements with suppliers, funder limits and condition and federal legislation. The theatre section shares in your perception that the very best way to avoid audit results, litigation and actual physical and psychological damage is to detect challenges.
As one of the departments with the minimum funding, the most affordable-paid out college and team, and the most likely office to be removed thanks to funds cuts, we are accustomed to frugality and using assets wisely. It is significant to notice that our section is not like most what we invest in can range tremendously depending on the reveals we existing each and every season. Also, our job involves us to locate exclusive remedies to recurring issues in order to conduct organization cost-effectively, effectively and properly.
I hope the next details supplies sufficient justification and rationale for purchases red-flagged all through the inside audit procedure.
- Rationale for One-Time Purchases
A. Stiletto heels from dragqueenshoes.com
These sneakers had been acquired for the generation of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. Photographs of the actors carrying stated objects can be found on the department’s webpage. The costume designer needs to remind you she wears a woman’s sizing 6.5. Photographs of her shoes (and her wearing her footwear) are also connected. If you wish to look at her sneakers and evaluate them with the shoes employed for the creation, remember to make an appointment with her in the course of her business hours. The rationales for related wig and hosiery buys are forthcoming.
B. Intercourse toys and penis whistles from Priscilla’s: Wherever Fun and Fantasy Satisfy
Vibrators and other related goods have been applied as props in the participate in In the Following Space (or The Vibrator Play). The enjoy has been carried out on Broadway (located in New York, N.Y.) and won a few Tony Awards (the greatest award in the American theatre profession). The penis whistles (toy-like, plastic in nature and not dissimilar to an Oscar Mayer Wienermobile whistle but in the form of a penis) ended up utilized in a output of Barcelona: A Love Untold (see hooked up affidavit presented by the pupil actress’s grandmother, who noticed each productions in human being). The prop master respectfully wishes me to convey that if he required to acquire such objects for his individual use, he would not have endured the humiliation of making use of a university p-card and tax-exempt variety.
C. Men’s pajama set from MeUndies
You should see hooked up section playbills for the output of Rear Window. If you are unfamiliar with this tale, we advise you watch the film model on Netflix at your leisure. Alternatively, you may obtain Rear Window on tv. The movie options James Stewart (a renowned actor) and is directed by Alfred Hitchcock (also famous).
- Rationale for Recurring Purchases
A. Five gallons of Skol vodka from Good Spirits Great Wine and Drinks
Vodka is utilized to make what is usually known in the theatre profession as “costume water.” In the course of the show’s operate, actors may well exude certain bodily fluids (liquid and gas sorts) that may be absorbed by their costume and produce lingering unpleasant/offensive odors. Creation schedules do not find the money for the time to mail costumes to a dry cleaner, which is costly and would damage some customized outcomes on the fabric. So, a mixture of vodka and astringent (Sea Breeze becoming the most well-liked brand name) is sprayed on the costumes to freshen them. This hypoallergenic system is safer, more cost-effective and much more productive than working with business goods. Remember to notice: the combination is not drinkable. Any temporarily unused straight vodka is secured in a locked desk drawer to prevent learners from accessing it.
B. A box of 500 rely of unlubricated condoms from Amazon.com
Actors perspire a terrific offer beneath the phase lights (also See Item II-A). Condoms are employed to encapsulate and safeguard microphone battery packs to reduce them from shorting out all through episodes of physical exertion by the actors. Accomplishing so is major economical financial savings given that buying 500 battery packs would be value-prohibitive. Remember to refrain from red-flagging these purchases the seem technician has already designed various problems to his union and doesn’t enjoy hearing giggles in the background throughout phone calls from the small business office environment inquiring about stated invest in. He mentioned in producing to me, which I am compelled to share, “I am not amused.”
C. Own lubricant bought from CVS
This item is used to fill the base of ashtrays utilised when actors smoke on phase in the course of output. Whilst this item has other utilizes of an intimate mother nature, particular lubricant is an superb way to mitigate hearth possibility, as it extinguishes lit cigarettes rapidly. Make sure you note: the rationale for acquiring cigarettes from Sheetz and vape pens from Good Vape will be offered underneath individual cover.
It is my sincere hope that these responses and affiliated documentation suffice. Enable me know if you have additional issues or worries.
Sincerely,
Rob (Jazz Hands) Fosse, M.F.A.
Chair, Loesser Division of Theatre
*The items stated in this posting and the method used accurately explain the functions by theatre departments across the place. These things (along with issues like perishable meals, random office provides and stripper poles), utilized for theatre productions, are usually pink-flagged by inner auditors and small business places of work. The names of folks and the establishment are fictional. Be aware: Remaining snarky or applying thinly veiled sarcasm when communicating with internal auditors is not recommended.
